Leaving

With time, we will leave everything that means the world to us if we have to learn and to grow as individuals.
Life is hard, I always heard that but never understood what it meant exactly, working hard, raise our children? Yes, but nobody told me there is much more to life than that.
We will have to leave so many things and people behind, so many of those we love, our home town, family, friends, even who we supposed to be.
I always hated to leave anything, I wanted all that I loved or still do to be forever mine but can’t have it or the price will be too high…
I was very happy with my solid life and everything looked so unbreakable, but yes all falls a part some day and it was time for this shadow to learn many lessons and very difficult ones too. Today I can’t feel safe in a “solid” life with everything as it should be, for me it's just a pretty painting to be admired and then move on, always with myself as my best friend.
Leaving all my expectations, all dreams behind, freeing myself to enjoy life while it lasts and every moment till the last second.
Leaving can be a good thing if you don’t fight it, means constant change, constant learning and growing up very fast maybe, and depending on how u live your journey, with luck ending up to be a narcissist.
I'm very happy for the decisions I made and my mistakes too, without them I couldn’t learn how to do better.
Deep in my mind my old self still wishes a quiet predictable life with only one love, a real home, one town, same friends same safety… One of those dreams that didn’t happened but I’m glad I dreamed it.